Wednesday, November 22, 2006

2006 07 16 Changes on the Horizon

Well, I'm anticipating a season of change coming onto me. Things have calmed down (as much as they can with two small children) and have become a little more "normal" day to day. And, as I look around at the crumbling piles around me of things I have let slide as I’ve pushed out two babies in under two years (LOL), it's time to get a little more back on track.
I do this with a healthy amount of fear. I have a history of over-committing and overcompensating with a wicked side order of not being able to say NO! I also deal daily with ADD which is currently un-medicated. Between trying to conceive, being pregnant, and nursing, I’ve been off my ADD meds for nearly 5 years. It is a constant struggle to fight the daily symptoms as well as the accompanying anxiety and depression that results from that struggle.

I’ve also put on about 70-80 pounds since getting married. It complicated our infertility struggles as well as challenged our budding married life. Then, it was pushed aside as I was told I “couldn’t” diet while I was pregnant or nursing.

Then, I think I’m ready to start picking back up some my responsibilities at church. I’d love to start singing with the praise and worship team again. I’d love to teach adult Sunday school again. It’s SO tempting to jump at the chance to teach at our Bible school without seeking if it’s God’s will for me right now. Also, our church weight loss group, affectionately called “Tub Scouts”, is starting back up and I would LOVE to participate! Diet, exercise, and fellowship “cure” many of the problems that come with the overweight and ADD issues.

So, I’ve decided to put a small toe in the proverbial water…talked to Da Hubby after church today and, first of all, I’ll join Tub Scouts again. Then, come August the decision with regards to Bible school will be made. In September, it’ll be time for a decision about teaching Sunday school. Then, when Viking #2 reaches his first birthday just after the holidays, it’ll be time to start thinking about weaning and visiting the doctor to restart my medication. I think it’s gonna be a busy 6 months! LOL So, as my first “selfish” goal, I’m hoping to lose 80 pounds in the next 19 months. Nineteen months from now I will be turning 40!

Father, please give me counsel, direction, and insight as I start to resume some “extra” activities outside the home. Lead to me know what is in Your will and what things are no longer important in Your plan for me…

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