Thursday, February 1, 2007

"I Am From" - Contest from Owlhaven

(Since I'm on a contest "bender", there's another one I'd like to enter. Owlhaven is running a creative writing contest with the prompt "I Am From..." She has three prizes: one for her "I Am From..." prompt; one for her "I Am..." prompt, and one for the person who refers the most commentors to her site. Soooooo...this post is linked to her contest but should you go there to check out my competition (LOL), please consider leaving a comment that says something like "Beth from Two Little Vikings sent me"! Wish me luck!)

I am the baby born in the city Henry Ford built to high school sweethearts whose marriage didn’t last and who remembers peeking out from under squinty-closed eyelashes to “fake” sleeping while waiting for goodnight kisses from my daddy.

I am the child who played curb ball, flashlight tag, and Frisbee. Who loved swimming and riding my bicycle with no hands. Who dreamed of living in a big city, maybe downtown Detroit or New York City? And never thought she would marry or be a mother.

I am the teenager who was internally fearful and seeking approval while externally appearing outgoing and confident. Who wore eyeliner heated with a lighter and iridescent blue eye shadow and loved chocolate milk shakes and Fritos for school lunch and hated having teachers roll their eyes at my ADD self while still getting A’s and B’s. Who found herself in the ER to have rocks, pebbles, and debris plucked from the tops of my feet from an impulsive, botched “Tarzan swing” attempt on a rope over a lake that ended abruptly in the gravel at the shoreline. And then started dating the guy who had carried me a mile back to car. Who dreamed of getting out of the town I grew up in. And knew I would eventually find someone who “got” me.

I am the woman who made awful decisions in and after college despite just wanting to be “good”, loved, and understood. Who now loves being in church, being with my husband and kids, and being outdoors.

I am the mother who loves blowing raspberries on my kids naked bellies and necks to make them laugh. And goes crazy if I have to listen to them fight. And whose moments of perfect bliss come when the oldest says “I love you Mommy” unsolicited and the little one leans in and gives me those big open-mouth baby kisses.

I am the former video/audio production intern, the former 911 dispatcher, the former public safety officer, and currently-temporarily-retired language arts teacher who loves the “aha” moments in students, teaching Shakespeare, and acting silly while opening young minds to poetry and grammar. Who avoids paperwork and grading homework like a root canal. And who is not sure I’ll ever teach in a traditional classroom again.

I am the woman who is blessed to have a friend of 30-plus years who I’d paid to not talk about me but thankfully don’t have to (LOL). And I'm the woman who wants to be courageous for my Savior, myself, and my daughter. And who longs to be a godly woman and wife.

I am the person who still feels desperately inadequate and unworthy in the sight of God. And still needs to fully, mindfully accept His forgiveness for my sins. I am the woman who still loves reading and music but never seems to find much time for either. Who still longs to learn a better sense of priorities and balance.

I am the person who dreams of grown, happy, healthy, saved children. And heaven. And is grateful for salvation.

5 comments:

owlhaven said...

This was wonderful. I especially could relate to the final paragraph!

Mary, mom to many

Unashamed said...

Wow. This is touching and honest and funny and beautiful.

Just like you.

Beth/Mom2TwoVikings said...

Anita - *blush* Thank you. I've often felt out-of-sorts, misunderstood, and beaten up for just wanting to simply be me without any pretenses, facades, motives, etc. Never very good at "politics", working a crowd, persuasive speaking, etc.

I never really felt I could just be purely me until I found Da Hubby, came to Christ (again! LOL), and found other Christians and my church family who love me just as I am with my foibles, hang-ups and all! LOL

But, I'm blessed by your comment. Again, thanks!

Donna. W said...

It's a great entry. I almost feel I know you.

Carol said...

I enjoyed it, too. It has a nice cadence and an uplifting tone.

Well done!