So...we've made our initial move to Illinois. And, we are loving it. We are finally living together as a family for the first time in 6 months. We love our little town of 3,000 people. We're loving the area which is a beautiful combination of wooded wonders, a beautiful river, and currently adolescent corn fields. :)
And, in the course of enjoying the weekend's festivities, we're starting to meet some neighbors. At the parade yesterday, a recently divorced mom with a couple kids from across the street sat next to us. She was alone since her boys were with their dad but we visited before the parade got underway. While we waited, I remembered that I had root beer and a little ice cream left back at DaHubby's apartment a block away.
So, I walked back, threw the camera (which we'd forgot) and the 2 liter of root bear in a shopping bag, and made up four cups with a scoop of ice cream each. Then, I carried the bag and the cups back to where DaHubby, the Vikings, and our neighbor were sitting.
Once there, I opened the root bear and proceeded to pour some in the first cup. I then gave it to DaHubby. The neighbor, who had already set a precedent of offering her opinion on situations freely, loudly cajoled DaHubby when he began enjoying it instead of passing it along to one of the Vikings.
She looked at me as if to say "aren't you gonna say something" and I simply said "he's head of the household. He gets his first."
DaHubby and I chuckled about it a few times later that day but it got me to thinking. And, I posted on Facebook a poll of my momma friends to see what they said. Now, I'm not sure I asked the question in a clear enough way but, apparently, I am alone in wanting to serve my hubby first. LOL
Now, I realize "different families, different rules" and I'm not throwing out judgment on anyone who disagrees. My thought is he not the head of household? Isn't delayed gratification and patience and respect something my kids should be learning? Plus, the practical side of it - I have only one set of hands. So, if not DaHubby, then which kid? Does whoever gets his/her treat first really carry that much significance anyway.
I've been working through the process of what exactly Biblical submission means for me as a believer and as a wife as I've mentioned before. And, I've viewed my staying at home full time as a way to serve my family so my going first isn't really a comfortable option for me. So, serving DaHubby first makes perfect sense to me. It doesn't always happen - mostly because he likes his food with significantly more spice, salt, and pepper than the rest of us so often I leave his plate on the counter so he can season his food as he likes.
But, my neighbor was seriously floored by my decision. Like shocked silent momentarily which is saying something considering the amount of conversation we've had in the few days we've been here.
And, my friends have reminded me of their perfectly good and reasonable reasons to serve their kids first...or not serve them at all as everyone would get their own food. It's just my ongoing evaluation of questioning what we're doing and why exactly so that we are consciously making choices for our family that work for us.
If given the same set of circumstances, what would YOU have done?